You’ve seen those yoga tank tops with “High Vibe” or “Vibe Tribe” or “Good Vibes Only” printed across the front, right? Don’t get me wrong, I love them. I even own one from Super Love Tees that I wear all the time. But there’s something that no one tells you about raising your vibration. You will lose people, maybe even people you were once close to. You will lose friends, and very likely some family members will stop associating with you.

So what does “raising your vibration” mean, anyway? It means taking a mirror to your soul and peering into the dark spaces you thought were unlovable, dragging them into the light, and loving your entire self, dark parts included. When you love all of yourself, you can then love others. Recognizing and acknowledging the dark parts of yourself allows you to heal and grow. When you open that door and knock down those walls within yourself, others will feel it in your presence and be drawn to it. Raising your vibration means not giving a damn about doing what others or society tells you you should do, but instead following your heart and soul on whatever crazy adventure calls to your deep, primal self.

This world doesn’t need another paper-pusher working 40+ hours a week at a job that accomplishes nothing but paying the bills. What this world needs is radical love, shameless honesty, and brave hearts to stand up against ignorance, bigotry, and fear. While most people will be drawn to your openness, there are some that will fear it and will pull away, friends and family included. Once you’re totally honest with yourself, that honesty reflects back on others, and they may not be ready or willing to see themselves without the sweet sugar-coating society tells us we need in order to be socially accepted.

Honest relationships aren’t all rainbows and unicorns—there’s a lot of pain and growth involved for a relationship to remain honest and healthy. I’d much rather have authentic, honest, open relationships than shallow ones any day. This means I’ve lost people. I’m not telling you it’s easy. It’s difficult and requires sacrifice, but it’s worth it. Yes, some people will no longer be a part of your life, but this will open up space for others to enter.

Raising your vibration doesn’t mean you’re happy all the time. All emotions actually become more intense, sadness and joy included. The difference is that your mind is able to remain calm no matter what emotion(s) you’re experiencing. These high vibes are world-changing, because the change begins within, and that’s the only kind of real change that exists. So become intensely self-aware, practice yoga, meditate, chant, spend time in nature. Parts of your journey will be suffocatingly lonely, but somewhere the magic will happen and you’ll come to embrace and enjoy the loneliness, which will then enable you to enjoy the company of friends, lovers, and family even more.

Let’s change the world together. I’ll see you on the high side.